If you haven't heard, working on your Mental Health is the cool new thing you have to try. I'm not saying this is a sleazy way, but rather because COVID and quarantine tore my mental health up. I think a lot of us are dealing with some fucked up situations in our heads right now and we're all doing our best to get back.

But how?

I spent all Sunday weeding our flowerbeds at our new house.

I know... not how I pictured Sunday-Funday either because this is not my favorite activity. But in some weirdly odd way, it felt cathartic to me. Plus, it just felt so damn good when it was all done.

Yes, I celebrated with a cold beer afterward. Thank you #foundersbrewingco

But with it not being done in a while, this took a long-ass time. Not only were there a lot of weeds because #maintinance dammit! But the weeds were all so different and some were WAY more time-consuming than others. Some of the weeds were so small and barely noticeable, others I thought were beautiful planted greenery but...

Can I be honest with you? I haven't been working out as hardcore as I used to...

...and I like it.

But I still make exercise a priority in my life because instead of thinking that I HAVE to do it, I now WANT to do it. My journey to Intuitive movement (aka moving your body consistently and sustainably while knowing when to push and when to pull back), started off with me venturing from one extreme -hardcore workouts- to another -not working out at all.

If you've done the same, you have a leg up here and I'll tell you why.

Here's how I changed my perspective from forcing myself to work out to now thinking of workouts as an act of self-care, like brushing my teeth.

FROM ONE EXTREME...

After years of Bodybuilding training, working out 2 hours a day 6/7 days a week with no breaks except for one yearly vacation, I had a severe burnout...duh... oh and also crazy injuries that led me straight into the care of a physical therapist.

A fitness and health enthusiast's worst...

3 MAIN REASONS WHY YOU FEEL GUILTY LEAVING FOOD ON YOUR PLATE

...And why you might be finding it hard to stop eating when you're full.

We’ve all been there.

“I’m not hungry but I feel like I have to finish this.”

“I only have a few bites left, I might as well kill it.”

“I shouldn’t waste this so I’ll eat it even though I’m full.”

“I’m getting really stuffed but I’ll just finish it so I don’t hurt their feelings.”

“I don’t know when I’ll be able to eat this again so I’ll just eat it all now.”

Food can be used as leftovers, reheated for another meal or snack, given to a friend, or even used in addition to another meal. Yet out of habit, we eat an entire plate of food, regardless of how full we are or the size of the portion because of the scarcity mindsets above.

1) YOU'RE AFRAID OF HURTING SOMONE'S FEELINGS:

We can clean our plates for fear of...

Hubby and I are heading to Arizona in 2 weeks for a golf trip and I bought some new bathing suits for the trip!

Even after my journey of healing my relationship with food and learning how to love and accept my body, it was still pretty antagonizing for my inner mean girl.

I would be lying if I said it wasn’t a bit triggering trying each piece on because they made me a little more self-conscious about my body at first.

A bigger size, more body, and new territory that couldn’t be covered up by an oversized sweatshirt and high-waisted yoga pants were a bit terrifying as I stared at my no-longer-lean body in the mirror.

But it was something I was weirdly proud of in a way.

At first, the insecurity took over because weight gain is such a de-value of worth in our culture. If you gain weight, people see you as not taking care of yourself, losing your health, and “falling off the wagon.”

But this weight gain was my personal story of triumph over eating...

The day I knew I had to get help...

(Contains potentially triggering content)

This is an embarrassing story I have only shared with a few people. But the more I open up about this, the more I think people can relate to this in some way.

People always ask me what my turning point was from an obsessive world of strict fitness and weighing out my broccoli, to a completely free, effortless, and peaceful world around food and exercise.

HERE'S WHAT HAPPENED THE DAY I KNEW SOMETHING HAD TO CHANGE

It was Summertime and my firstborn son (16 months old at the time) was taking swim lessons. I had taken the past year to "get my body back" after baby and even though I promised myself I would never go back to bulimia and super restrictive macro counting again, I got to a point where if I wanted to get even leaner, I couldn't do it without severe force. I was already lean and fit, but my perfectionism drove me to want MORE! MORE! Always MORE! Because what I had was never good...

THERE’S A DIFFERENCE BETWEEN TRAINING FOR STRENGTH & TRAINING FOR THE LOOK OF STRENGTH

After killing off the need to look small and thin, I wandered into the wavering and destructive world of needing to “look” fit, muscular, and like I could kick your ass instead.

It’s a common progression from wanting weight-loss to needing to look like one of Super Woman’s sidekicks. ‍ Especially if you grew up in the ’90s like me and walked into the new trend of “strong is the new skinny” in the 2000s.

After seeing an incredible amount of women being praised for their look in BodyBuilding Shows and CrossFit competitions, I wanted a piece of that glamorous and "healthy" spotlight as well.

“Screw looking thin, strong is healthier! I’ll just look muscular instead of skinny! I get more calories this way, too right?” -Christi a decade ago

But here lies the problem within this thinking...

This is just another way of...

I DON'T DIET ANYMORE, BUT I HAVE TAKEN AWAY SOME GEMSTONES FROM MY YEARS OF CHRONIC DIETING AND I'M PUTTING THEM TO GOOD USE IN MY WORLD OF FOOD FREEDOM.

I'm finding the silver lining through my years of toiling with an unhealthy relationship with food and hating myself lean. I spent too many years of my life living in fear and scarcity around food rules. I self-destructed after living a life of food restrictions such as forbidding carbs, demonizing sugar, and repelling processed foods. I was a meticulous macro counter who spent a lifetime hating my body at all shapes and sizes thinking happiness was another 5 lbs leaner.

After making peace with food and healing my relationship with my body image, I can honestly say that there was some good in all of this. Hear more about my story HERE.

Not only in the fact that I found out that a life of "only clean eating" and living a meticulous "fitspo life" was NOT the life that made me happy....

BINGE EATING 101
(Pssst... there is a free download of this in the link below.)

Binge Eating usually stems from two different factors:
1) When biological hunger/appetite is not being fulfilled.
2) When an emotional need is being suppressed with food.

1) EXPLAINED: Biological hunger/appetite usually comes from restricting certain foods, food groups, or quantities in meals or snacks. 𝘠𝘦𝘴, 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘯𝘤𝘭𝘶𝘥𝘦𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘴𝘵𝘳𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘷𝘦 𝘥𝘪𝘦𝘵𝘪𝘯𝘨. This takes our brains into scarcity mode around that food source. (Friend, our brains are so old and wired for survival.) But because of this primal need for survival, our minds focus on that restricted food that seems scarce. And when we find finally it... or more realistically have a 𝘤𝘩𝘦𝘢𝘵 𝘥𝘢𝘺 or say 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘦𝘸 𝘪𝘵... 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗹𝗼 𝗯𝗶𝗻𝗴𝗲! It’s not your willpower. It’s our biology.

...Thanks Wilma and Fred...

2) EXPLAINED: An emotional need that is being suppressed with food can make us feel good for a moment, but will actually create a worsened feeling of fullness and...

WHAT DO YOU EAT ON VACATIONS/WEEKENDS AWAY?

I just came back from a STELLAR weekend away with the hubs and it was so magical.

Something hit me as we were driving up and stopping at a restaurant to grab some breakfast before hitting the Northern Michigan Treetops Golf Course.

“What sounds good for breakfast?” I asked myself. 𝘍𝘳𝘶𝘪𝘵, 𝘰𝘢𝘵𝘮𝘦𝘢𝘭 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘰𝘮𝘦 𝘴𝘤𝘳𝘢𝘮𝘣𝘭𝘦𝘥 𝘦𝘨𝘨𝘴, I Immediately answered back.

Whoa... WTF...

That decision was lightning fast and it felt right. Even if I would've gone with the pancakes and fried egg breakfast, I just knew that wouldn't sit well on a hot summer day playing golf outside. But I wasn't as concerned with what I was eating as I was to how this meal was going to make me feel.

I can remember a time when I only wanted “bad” foods on vacation because that was the only time I 𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙤𝙬𝙚𝙙 myself to have them.

Does this sound familiar?

I FEEL you, friend.

And you know what? Having anxiety over what you eat on vacation is a time-wasting,...